I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Randomize
