Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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