I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Randomize
