do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
Everyone says I win the strip club
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
Randomize
