This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
Randomize
