When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
I just gargled with NyQuil
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize
