We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
Hello my rib-scented angel!
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
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