I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Randomize
