Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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