Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
