i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
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