What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Randomize
