i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Randomize
