Three words: puerto rican gang bang
you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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