You don't have asthma, your pregnant
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
Randomize
