Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
Randomize