Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
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