handjob tips. give me some.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize
