Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
Randomize
