DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Randomize
