i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
