It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
This is classic penis vs brain.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
Randomize
