Where is the hickey?
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
Randomize
