P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
