Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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