some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
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