I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Randomize
