Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
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