I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
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