i permit you to call me
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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