i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
Randomize
