I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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