I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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