Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
I will be naked everywhere
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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