Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize
