I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
At the funeral we'll say nice things, like "She was delightfully extreme, psychotically wonderful, and could probably drink all you fuckers under the table."
That's literally the perfect eulogy
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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