Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
dude i'm inner monologue high
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
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