my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
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