hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize
