I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
