just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
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