He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
PS: I just woke up from my shower
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
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