Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
