How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
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