there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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