Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
if only i could text you this smell
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
