If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
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