Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
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