What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
Randomize
