dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
Randomize